Happy New Year

the old, the new and what follows us around

dawn view, Palermo

“There is nothing with which every man is so afraid as getting to know how much he is capable of doing and becoming.”

— Søren Kierkegaard

I used to heap a lot of expectations onto new beginnings (such as a new year), convinced that if I made a big enough leap, then past mistakes would be erased and I could get a fresh start.

It reminds me of something we used to hear in college – that if someone did something truly awful, they would not only be expelled but expunged, their records wiped clean off the system as if they’d never existed. Except, on contemplation, it couldn’t be true because then the student could simply apply again on a clean record, and the college would be none the wiser.

“Dirty” records, as it were, serve a purpose. If I don’t carry with me the imprints of past errors then I could just as well make them all over again. The scars are worthy!